Part 5: The Numbers

The financial records arrived in several batches. Ms. Alvarez reviewed them with an accountant and explained what was known, what still needed documentation, and which expenses belonged in the children's plan. She did not promise a particular outcome before the information was complete.

Evan's initial offer had assumed costs that did not reflect two children or their actual care. It also treated my consulting income as though it would remain unchanged immediately after the birth. We asked for a revised proposal based on current records and a schedule for reviewing it as circumstances changed.

Evan's attorney requested my recent invoices. I provided them through Ms. Alvarez, along with a note explaining which projects were complete and which I had referred to colleagues. The numbers were not a measure of my worth as a parent. They were information the attorneys needed to discuss the financial arrangement.

At home, Dana helped me make a budget for the next three months. We included ordinary costs, medical expenses, and a small reserve for unexpected needs. When an item was uncertain, we marked it as an estimate instead of pretending to know the exact figure.

Evan missed a scheduled call with the pediatric office. He sent a message afterward saying a meeting had run long. I uploaded the written instructions the office had provided and asked him to contact the team if he had additional questions. I also asked him to give earlier notice when he might miss an appointment.

He apologized and changed the calendar for the next visit. I did not interpret one missed call as proof that every future visit would fail. I did expect him to take responsibility for catching up.

Mira's attorney contacted Ms. Alvarez about coordinating information relevant to the children's financial support. The attorneys handled the request. I did not need to know the details of Mira's private life, and she did not need to know mine. Our children could have their needs considered without either mother being treated as a rival.

At the next meeting, the mediator asked Evan why he had emphasized having a son when he brought the folder to the hospital. He said he had grown up hearing that the family name and business should pass to a boy. He had repeated that idea without examining it.

“Does knowing where it came from make it less harmful?” I asked.

“No,” he said. “It tells me what I need to unlearn.”

He described a conversation with his father in which he had corrected a similar remark about the girls. I was glad he had done it. I also wanted him to understand that I could not verify every conversation he reported. What I could see was how he spoke to and about our daughters when he was with them.

At the end of the session, we agreed to a temporary schedule for visits and a date to review the revised financial proposal. The mediator did not decide the legal questions. Each of us would consult our attorney before signing anything.

That night I opened my notebook to the page with the names. I added the date of the next appointment and a question for the care team. Then I closed it. For the first time in weeks, the next page was not a demand from someone else. It was a list I had chosen to make.